Every day, reborn

Today is Wednesday.

Do you remember any special Wednesday out of so many Wednesdays?  Or do you remember any of the special weekday or any special date in your life? 

Be honest, I don't remember. Well, maybe do, only some people birthdays, my birthday, and the day I got serious accident.

I am not good in remembering date, or date with special event. That was the reason somehow I wasn't like subject of history, full with persons' names or years or dates. Somehow, I was still getting good grade on the subject.

Birthday. Since couple of years ago, when I start wondering the meaning of it, I don't celebrate nor I will wish others on their birthdays. Some says, birthday was the day your mother dealt with great pain and risked her life to bring you to this world, we shouldn't celebrate. Well, agree but disagree. Because I believe, yes mother was dealt with great pain and risking her life, but also was the happier moment of her bringing her child to this world.

For many years, I am only doing simple celebration, if have to say one, is spending time together with family members or loved one. It is precious moment of my birthday, no birthday cake, no candle, no decoration, just sitting and chatting.

Somehow, I still like festival moments. That is the moment, friends are gathered, or relative and family members are gathered together. That is the only moment, we able catch up after long time not seeing each other. Some even after so many years then only meet up again.

Life is long, when you lost in it. But life is short, when people you know are living this world.

Everyday of the morning, I wake up and thankfully I am still giving the chance to be part of this world. Every night when I on bed, close my eyes, thankfully I was part of today.

Everyday, is a birthday. 

Journey to data and analytical work - part 1

How is my working life linked to data analysis? I was wondering too.

Supposedly started as technician back to year 2002, never thought of data analysis, and no idea what it was.

Back to then when handling MEPS and EMV deploymwnt projects, I was recording down number of things: the movements of EFTPOS terminals, the movements of MEPS SAM cards, the clients information,  et cetera. It all on the ms excel spreadsheet, even sometime just on paper. That time, no proper tracking inventory or tracking system, everything was on excel spreadsheet.

On that time, the purpose was very simple: to have evidence and protecting myself. Because I was newbie in the working life ( I worked for couple of months before as promoter and computer technician, but still fresh after graduated from university), and it was hardly for someone to help or protecting me. With me and the other malay partner as technical support, and working under those very forgetful managers, it was caution and reasonable steps.

On the time, had not thought much, records were just a pure records, no further major manipulation from there, other than just got some statistical results like devices faulty rate, deployment rate, returned rate, et cetera.

My recording process continued for years till got more human resources: girls on inventory and reporting, and guys in technical support. But the inventory and reporting system was basically just directly keyed in those records into ms access tables, without UI, not centerised and not controlled. Of cause errors happened, shouting heard daily of missing records or records being overwritten.

Till company was taken over on 2006...

Learning

Life is always about learning, none stop learning.

Why we learn? To be better than what we were, to be more knowledgeable, to be helpful to others and to protect ourselves.

We can't stop learning: learn to be better as children, friends, students, citizens, parents, husbands, wives, et cetera. We are playing multi roles in daily life or along ours lives journeys. We just can't using a standard code for different roles.

Or maybe other people can. When they think it is enough, they can refuse to learn more. But not for me.

I am born with big curiosities. I want to know things I am puzzled with. Maybe not to deep understanding of it, but at least a general logic, fundamental understanding of it. I like new things, knowing things is fun.

Well, learning is fun, but sharing knowledges is more fun, if get to right people.

Quit

There is a quote says

"The moment you're ready to quit is usually the moment right before a miracle happens. Don't give up."

I have been believing it for long time, pushing myself for many things, be optimistic on things in my hands, in my life: I am going to get what I wanted, things are getting better and better, and so on.

But in the other hand, after many years passed, I wondering if it was right. Am I to blind or to passive that cannot see things clearly, things are not going as expected?

Or am I feel too unsecure that has myself moved on but then backward again? I would be nothing at the end of my life journey, if i keep doing the same thing, wouldn't l?

Need to change and need to quit if necessary. Things that cannot move on, be better, it is time to quit.

冲劲

以前大学毕业后，二十多岁出头，曾有一段很长的时间，都会失眠。

那是一段非常繁忙的时期，大马银行提升MEPS 和emv  的时期。那时后，前公司technical 人员只有两位。有些时候，我们是在公司里过夜睡觉的。也因为压力大，很多时候都失眠，凌晨4或5点就回公司，开始工作到晚上9或10点才回家。

那时，就像其他打工仔一样，问自己为什么要这样勤力，工钱又不多，就拿千多块而已。可是，每一次把任务完成，把困难解决，责任做好，就有很大的满足感。

回想，那是一段很有冲劲的日子，很怀念的时期。

有冲劲，人生才有意义吧!

坚持。犹豫

坚持到底。我一直都相信，这是人生里必要的信念，也一直坚持实行这信念。

可是，当事情可能伤害到他人，或对他人构成困扰时，都让我犹豫不决。还需要坚持到底吗?

爱情，真的能坚持到底，真的会开花结果吗? 总是觉得，自己的情感抒发，告诉对方，都给对方带来困扰，对对方也许是精神上的折磨。这样，我不是很自私吗? 这样，我不是就是在伤害我喜欢的人吗?

反反复复的思考， 越想越多，越让我犹豫不决。

每个人都有自己的生活方式，而我又有什么权利去打扰对方的生活，给对方添麻烦呢?

婚宴

很少会出席同事或前同事的婚礼，之前应该只有两次吧。

我也不懂为什么这次会答应出席。也许人生路程走多了，希望能给予他人更多的祝福，更多的能量。

他的婚礼晚宴，挺温馨的，还有新郎子给新娘的惊喜，唱歌。虽然他紧张，歌声有些不准，就是感人。

婚姻，是两家人的事。但一对人能走在一辈子，不是因为他们都很完美，而是两个人一起的坚持，一起的扶持，在有不同之处，寻求共识，接受，结合。

新娘的爸爸说的好，"I give you my princess, and you have to make her queen."

祝福你们。